'Tis the season to be invited to, and attend holiday parties. The invitations may vary - an open house, a boss' cocktail party, or a five-course dinner,but the basics remain the same. Whatever the venue and however formal, it is always polite to bring a 'hostess' gift'. That may seem sexist and outdated, as the hostess may be a host, but the principle remains the same - it is always courteous and thoughtful to bring the person hosting the party a small gift of appreciation for the invite, especially when it involves a meal.
A bottle of wine is always a great choice, but don't expect it to be served, as the hosts may have already made their wine selection. A small bundle of flowers is always a welcome and nice touch, although you don't want to saddle the hostess with something else to do. Remember, the hostess gift is a small token of your appreciation, not a birthday present.
Last week we hosted our office staff at our home. Only one guest brought a hostess gift - a very nice bottle of Cabarnet we did eventually uncork. While this hostess doesn't need any more 'stuff', it reminded me of how many people are completely unaware of this social gesture. My 'gift' came in the form of the late arrival of most of the guests!
The hostess gift is by no means obligatory either, but it is always considered good form. A candle or handmade dish towel may not guarantee a future invite, but it will certainly warm a party-giver's heart. If you are attending a potluck, no further gift is necessary.
This old-fashioned custom is one of those gestures i'm delighted has survived the test of time. It is a sweet act of gratitude that does not require a great expense or effort. So remember, if you'll be a guest at a holiday celebration this week, bring a little something with you, because it DOES 'Manner' A Lot!
Merry Christmas!
Showing posts with label Parties. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Parties. Show all posts
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
R.S.V.P.
With the arrival of the Christmas season comes high season for socializing. As the invitations to parties and gatherings trickle into your life, via telephone, mail or electronically, note those oft-overlooked four letters somewhere at the end: R.s.v.p. Short for 'Repondez s'il vous plait', or 'please respond' in French, those letters are every bit as important as the details of the event.
There was a time when responding to an invitation was the rule, and not the exception it seems to have become today. Unfortunately for today's host or hostess, responding to the invitation is considered by many to be unnecessary. Nothing could be further from the truth! If you've ever thrown a party and were still awaiting a reply from half of the invitees, then you know how it affects everything from the amount of food to purchase to seating arrangements.
An invitation should be accepted or declined as soon as possible after it is received. The old school of thought was to respond within several days of receiving the invitation. But most certainly, before the deadline, if one is noted. To do otherwise is the height of RUDENESS, and at the very least, inconsiderate of the person extending the invitation.
My rule of thumb is to immediately note the response deadline in my planner, and to call immediately if I'm certain I can or cannot attend. If there is some question as to whether I will, the 'r.s.v.p. by' date stands on my calendar to remind me.
Same goes for the 'regrets only' format which has become popular in recent years.
It is no fun for the host to have to place numerous telephone calls days before the event, hunting down guests and their response. Nor is it nice to have empty seats and too much food. So the next invitation that crosses your social calendar, respond. Because it DOES 'Manner' a lot.
There was a time when responding to an invitation was the rule, and not the exception it seems to have become today. Unfortunately for today's host or hostess, responding to the invitation is considered by many to be unnecessary. Nothing could be further from the truth! If you've ever thrown a party and were still awaiting a reply from half of the invitees, then you know how it affects everything from the amount of food to purchase to seating arrangements.
An invitation should be accepted or declined as soon as possible after it is received. The old school of thought was to respond within several days of receiving the invitation. But most certainly, before the deadline, if one is noted. To do otherwise is the height of RUDENESS, and at the very least, inconsiderate of the person extending the invitation.
My rule of thumb is to immediately note the response deadline in my planner, and to call immediately if I'm certain I can or cannot attend. If there is some question as to whether I will, the 'r.s.v.p. by' date stands on my calendar to remind me.
Same goes for the 'regrets only' format which has become popular in recent years.
It is no fun for the host to have to place numerous telephone calls days before the event, hunting down guests and their response. Nor is it nice to have empty seats and too much food. So the next invitation that crosses your social calendar, respond. Because it DOES 'Manner' a lot.
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